Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
