Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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