Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
