He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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