how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
im holly from the hills drunk
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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