You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
