How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
