Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Randomize
