These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
