Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
