I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I believe in your delicious
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
