I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
