So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
