Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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