He kissed a someone with a penis
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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