Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
