Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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