He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
