Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
