Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
