Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
