i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
