I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Randomize
