singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
