I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
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