how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
