I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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