Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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