Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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