It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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