The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
