I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
