Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize