he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize