grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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