I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i dont even know how to be here
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
