weddingsv make me drug and hornr
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
