But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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