that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
