Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
