he was CRYING into my vagina
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
