You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
