he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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