At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
We don't watch enough power rangers
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
