I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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