I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
