spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
