I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
