So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
