apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize