omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
ok first of all what the fuck
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
